"Not a given": German athlete happy to have survived after World Championships start

At the World Athletics Championships in Tokyo, things came full circle for Jonathan Hilbert. In 2021, the race walker sensationally won Olympic silver there, and now he finished 16th in the 35-kilometer race. Afterwards, he shed "tears of relief." Because there's much more behind him than just hard training.

The tears of racewalker Jonathan Hilbert at the start of the World Athletics Championships were moving. "I was very close to death, and to be standing here today is simply unbelievable," said the 30-year-old at the start of the World Athletics Championships in Tokyo. After finishing 16th in the 35-kilometer race, Hilbert thanked many people, especially his fiancée, for their outpouring of support. It was a "very, very beautiful day to be standing here alive," he said.

Hilbert, who won silver in the 50-kilometer race at the Tokyo Olympics four years ago, returned to the big international stage, something he'd long thought of after his bout of depression. He shed "tears of relief" in the Japanese metropolis's national stadium.

• In case of suicide risk: Emergency call 112
• Germany-wide depression information hotline, free of charge: 0800 33 44 5 33
• Telephone counseling (0800/111-0-111 or 0800/111-0-222, free call)
• Children and Youth Hotline (Tel.: 0800/111-0-333 or 116-111)
• German Depression Helpline (regional crisis services and clinics, tips for those affected and their families)
• German Depression League

"I don't take this for granted. The last three years have been incredibly dark and difficult," Hilbert said. "I can only say to anyone struggling with depression: It's worth fighting, it's worth persevering, it's worth pushing through those deep valleys. If I can do it, others can too."

Hilbert had already made his illness public some time ago. It had developed gradually after the Tokyo Games, Hilbert reported in the stadium catacombs on Saturday after Canadian race walker Evan Dunfee's victory. After winning Olympic silver, he had struggled; injuries and illnesses hampered him, and there had been no athletic progress. His signature event, the 50-kilometer race walk, was removed from the Olympic program. The Thuringian native initially struggled with the new 35-kilometer distance.

The next highlight is in three weeks

At times, he "completely lost the will to live, lost his vitality." In October 2023, it was already very difficult, and in "January 2024, things really hit home." There were days when he could barely get onto the couch. When his fiancée, a teacher, came home from school in the early afternoon, he sometimes just lay on the couch, hadn't even eaten anything, and "just stared at the ceiling."

Hilbert sought help. "Some of them were really severe, depressive episodes. I think everyone who struggles with it, who knows a little about it, knows what a severe, depressive episode means," Hilbert said. "It's difficult to describe and completely abnormal. And to be standing here today is simply a dream." He is grateful for the support his parents, fiancée, sponsors, the police as his employer, and so many people have given him. His new coach has also encouraged him.

Now, the World Championship competition gives Hilbert confidence for his future in the sport, after having to start completely anew like a youth athlete. He also owes the fact that he was able to compete in the World Championships at all to teammate Christopher Linke. The veteran, who himself was "too bold" and clearly missed the top eight, finishing 14th, had lobbied the association to allow Hilbert to compete in the European Team Championships. There, he secured his ticket to the World Championships.

"It's incredible, and I couldn't have done it without all these people," said Hilbert, who wears a bracelet with his fiancée's name on his left wrist. And he'll soon experience another moment of happiness with her: the two are getting married in three weeks.